I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
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