All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
