well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
