Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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