You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
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