I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
do nipples grow back?
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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