so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize