a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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