we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize
