how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
