I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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