Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
