He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
he thought i was a dude.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
Well I just put wine in my tea
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize