He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
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