We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
