he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
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