I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
Randomize
