i just google imaged poop.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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