The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Randomize
