i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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