I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize
