dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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