i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
