I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Randomize
