Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
