My room smells like vodka and shame
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Randomize
