I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
Randomize
