Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize
