I hate your face
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
