No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
