Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize