oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
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