Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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