OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I need to stop coming to work sober
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize