Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
