Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize