Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Randomize
