the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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