I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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