erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
