The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
I'm going to buy her a puppy, let her fall in love with it, then kill it in front of her. Does that answer how I feel about her?
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize