how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
