Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
