Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
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