normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
