Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
Randomize
