So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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