In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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