So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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