May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
