NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize
